The Daily Stoic

According to Ryan Holiday, Stoicism is about focusing your effort on what’s under your control.

When faced with the hardships of the world, you can’t really control what comes your way, but you can control your perception of these things. Your opinions of them.

The book is structured as a series of daily Stoic quotes, and ruminations on them by Holiday.

I’m not sure I fully accept the premise. It’s seems very difficult to just kind of accept the bad things that are happening to you. That being said, being calm under pressure sounds great.

And I don’t think that the Stoics would advocate just doing nothing in the face of adversity - you can do things when bad things come your way, this is under your control.

Notes

January 18th

I found this pretty:

“Pass through this brief patch of time in harmony with nature, and come to your final resting place gracefully, just as a ripened olive might drop, praising the earth that nourished it and grateful to the tree that gave it growth.” - Marcus Aurelius, Meditations 4.48.2

January 20th

We can always restart things after a bad day.

January 21st

A morning ritual is important, even if the activity itself isn’t. It’s about taking time for yourself.

You carve out moments of quiet time for yourself - this aligns with the advice in Atomic Habits.

January 22nd

This about journaling, and how it’s important to take daily notes about how to improve each day, or a review of what happened during the day.

This tracks with org-roam Daily notes but I’m really bad at it. Maybe I need to try and get better.

January 31th

Philosophy as medicine for the soul. When things get tough, return to philosophy. Stoicism is meant to help you in troubled times.

February 3rd

People get anxious because they want something that is outside of their control.

From the book:

It’s as if we all belong to a religious cult that believes the gods of fate will only give us what we want if we sacrifice our peace of mind.

This is especially relevant with Trump in power. This is also much easier said than done.

February 10th

Being angry rarely helps. And even when it does it creates toxic side effects. Better to keep your head.

February 14th

Think before you act. It’s a cliche but important. Don’t act out of emotion.

February 15th

Basically this is about not worrying about hypothetical evils. I’m not sure I agree with it. Shouldn’t you prepare for the worst?

Maybe prepare for the worst but don’t worry about what might not happen.

February 21st

This reminds of Zen Buddhism - eliminating desires. If you desire nothing, nothing can hurt you.

This just seems like a recipe for emotional immaturity, though. Unhealthy. Not sure I buy it. It feels like you’re asking people to suppress what they want. Not good.

February 23rd

Don’t get mad at circumstance, because circumstance aren’t sentient. They don’t care about you.

“Why should I be angry at the world? As if the world would notice”

February 24th

Things don’t hurt you, you’re feelings about things hurt you.

Which…I don’t know, =again seems a bit like bullshit. If you’re being abused, it feels like it’s the abuse that’s hurting you. You have every right to be upset about it. This feels like victim blaming.

February 26th

Don’t react to people. Story about Lincoln, writing a letter to someone he had a beef with, and then putting it in his drawer, never sending it.

I can see this as a form of therapy. And I guess you should be very careful about what you say to people. You can never take something back once said.

February 28th

Just because you’ve fucked up once, doesn’t mean you have to give up. Regain your senses and try again.

March 5th

There is no such thing as a free lunch. Even free things cost us in our minds.

March 6th

Don’t perform for other people. Don’t bore them with stories about yourself. I’m not sure how seriously to take this. Surely sometimes people want to know about you? Maybe it just means to be humble.

March 8th

Don’t give your mind away to anyone or anything. Social media for example. I do waste a lot of time on YouTube for example.

March 18th

Another part where we emphasize that nothing external can frustrate you. It’s your interpretation that does it. I get it, but I find this to be the hardest part of Stoicism. It feels a bit like bullshit, like suppression.

March 19th

Accept and love what’s happening around us? hard when it’s actual fascism.

March 21st

You can take a vacation right now. Just sit down, listen to some music, meditate, etc.

Okay but…I like travelling. I like seeing interesting things and places.

March 25th

Get everything you want or want everything you have? The latter is easier. But I feel like this can lead to complacency. Lack of ambition.

April 1st

Negative thoughts every day colour your mind. You become what you think.

April 6th

Understand that you will meet horrible people during the day. Prepare for it. And forgive them for they know not what they do.

Easier said than done sometimes.

April 15th

Misfortune is a tax on life. It means that your life is good if bad things happen.

Interesting way of looking at it.

April 21st

Attention is a habit; letting your attention slip and wander builds bad habits and enables mistakes.

April 29th

Look up at the stars and put your problems in perspective.

May 14th

Take pleasure in your actions, rather than the results that come from them.

This is a good lesson, and applies to my blogging habits as well.

May 16th

This day is linked to habits, and aligns with Atomic Habits. If you want to build a habit, do it every day. Your goal is just not to break the chain, like your streak on Duo Lingo.

It works for bad habits too. Take it one day at a time.

May 17th

Philosophy is something that you apply. One never arrives. There is no destination, only direction.

May 26th

Worry less about what other people think, and more about what you think.

This is good advice, but I wonder if it can lead to being conceited and self absorbed. How to combat that?

June 3rd

Be flexible. Do something. Be modest in your goals. This also aligns with Atomic Habits. Do just a little every day if you can’t do more.

June 8th

This one is about tactics versus strategy. I feel like Stoics lean into tactics - the “process”. They are less concerned with the end results. Once again, Atomic Habits is relevant here, as it emphasizes action over results.

June 11th

Don’t make things worse by adding negative emotions to whatever else is happening. Don’t react for the sake of reacting.

Good advice. I wonder if there’s a place for reacting in a safe space, for therapy.

June 14th

Try the other handle. If your brother does you wrong, don’t grab it by his wronging, because this handle is incapable of lifting it. Instead use the other - that he is your brother, that you were raised together, and then you will have hold of the handles that raises.

• Epictetus

Not bad advice, but not sure what to do when the other person it totally toxic.

June 22nd

Telling yourself “Today I won’t get angry” doesn’t do anything on its own. People say that and then don’t do anything differently. This is the definition of insanity.

You have to learn from your failures and do something different.

June 26th

This is about breaking the pattern. If things are not going well, try doing the opposite of what you’re doing. See June 22nd.

June 29th

How do people become better? They work at it. They weren’t born into it. People become who they are, just like you can.

June 30th

The Obstacle is the Way. The things that stand in your way of a goal become they way you accomplish that goal.

I like this when applied to the IndieWeb. The IndieWeb is not as smooth or convenient as social media. But the obstacle is the way and it becomes part of the process. The extra effort becomes part of the ceremony.

Every obstacle is an opportunity to become better.

July 3rd

Turn a “have to” into a “get to”. Turn an obstacle into an opportunity. I think this is related to “The obstacle is the way”

July 6th

This is one about the struggle to get up in the morning.

You have a job to do - to be a human being.

July 8th

Self respect springs from the development of character.

To be without character is the worst of all fates.

To live without self-respect is to lie awake some night, beyond the reach of warm milk, the phenobarbital, and the sleeping hand on the coverlet, counting up the sins of commission and omission, the trusts betrayed, the promises subtly broken, the gifts irrevocably wasted through sloth or cowardice or carelessness

July 18th

This one is basically just a call to let other people live their lives at they see fit. Mind your own business, and give others their space.

July 22nd

You don’t have to do the right thing, just as you don’t have to do your duty. You get to, You want to.

July 24th

If you hear about the suffering of others (in the news let’s say) then just emoting to the news helps no one. Help if you can help.

July 25th

Some people make it to the top of the ladder of success only to realize that it’s only for an inscription on their gravestone.

August 3rd

We tell ourselves we need the right setup before we finally buckle down and get serious. Or that we really need a vacation.

I do get the sentiment, but I wonder then, do we never go on vacation? Sometimes a good chair is required.

August 8th

Don’t become trapped by idealism. Start from the world as it is, not as you want it to be. There are always lots of small things you could do right now. Don’t say the conditions are not right.

August 10th

“We don’t abandon our pursuits because we despair of ever perfecting them”

Don’t get bogged down by all or nothing thinking. Your actions are aimed at progress not perfection.

August 17th

This bit here says to not blame anyone when things go wrong. If someone is rude for example, it’s your sensitivity that interpreted the remark that way

I don’t think I buy this. Sometimes, people really do suck. Sometimes, the world really does suck.

August 21st

Worrying that sometime bad is going to occur is worse than useless. If it doesn’t happen you worried for nothing. If it does, then you worried twice.

Don’t worry twice. This is good advice. I’m not good at following it.

August 29th

You can try to increase your wealth or you can take a shortcut and just want less.

I like the idea behind this, but it’s easier said than done. Sometime you just want things. A vacation, a chair, etc.

September 1st

This one is about physical discomfort strengthening the soul, which I have mixed feelings about. I’m not going to pretend that I want to take a cold shower to make me strong.

September 27th

Power doesn’t corrupt - it reveals.

Prosperity, financial and personal is the same. Like the super soldier serum.

Hope for the strength of character to survive in bad fortune. I’m bad at this.

Never been laid off, saved money consistently. I’m soft.

September 30th

This is about protecting your mind from the misfortune happening to your body.

“If you lay violent hands on me, you’ll have my body, but my mind will remain with Stilpo”

October 7th

“Watching other people succeed is one of the toughest things to do - especially if we are not doing well ourselves”.

I know I have major trouble with this.

But empathy and selflessness takes practice. Tech yourself to actively cheer for another person.

Put aside jealously and possessiveness.

October 13th

“The best way to avenge yourself is to not be like that”.

• Marcus Aurelius

I like that, but very hard to do.

The best response, the best revenge is to exact no revenge at all.

October 14th

When someone is being ruse, or they smell, we fume, rather than just talk to the person. We expect people to improve without talking.

October 18th

Stay away from false friends.

But also: ask when we’ve been the false friend. Have we strung someone along and abandoned them when they needed help?

October 19th

When a bad habit reveals itself, counteract it with a commitment to a contrary virtue.

If you find yourself lazy, don’t fight it, just immediately take a walk.

Say something negative? Immediately qualify it with something nice.

October 22nd

Self-improvement shouldn’t be self serving. Are you exercising to get a six pack because you want to look good?

You should aim better, yes, but not at the expense of being a good person.

October 25th

What is it that only I can do? What is the best use of my limited time on this planet?

November 1st

Instead of being angry that something has happened to us, we can change our opinion about it.

The Stoics don’t just accept what happens, they actually try to enjoy it.

Not sure if I totally agree with this, but it’s interesting.

“Amor fati” - Love of fate.

November 11th

FDR accepted the fact that he had polio and made the most of it.

It’s the not thing, it’s what we make of it.

November 13th

Basically don’t complain? Don’t make excuses. I’m bad at this.

November 15th

To get upset by things is to wrongly assume that they will last. Embrace change.

November 16th

Hope and fear are the flip sides of the same coin. They go against Amor fati. Hope and fear contain a dangerous amount of want and worry.

I swear, this is why Stoicism gets maligned. It’s like you’re suppressing your emotions.

November 27th

Stoics cultivated a kind of curated ignorance. Turn your mind away from that which provokes it.

If politics upsets you, don’t bring it up.

It’s not weak to shut that out.

November 28th

If someone upsets you, maybe it’s on you. if a friend is unreliable, maybe it’s because we haven’t tried helping them.

November 29th

When something bad happens, we tend to pity ourselves and feel misery. But what good does that do? You have no idea what the future holds.

December 3rd

Philosophy is meant to help you improve your life. It’s not an idle academic pursuit.

December 5th

Don’t ignore the fact that bad things can happen to you at any time.

(Re; the current political climate)

December 8th

Don’t distract yourself from grief. Face it, process it. Try to find the positive in the situation.

December 9th

Guard your personal space diligently, from the intrusions of the world.

We’re good at protecting our physical property, but often lax at enforcing our mental boundaries.

December 10th

I say, let no one rob me of a single day who isn’t going to make a full return on the loss.

• Seneca

Don’t waste time with people who are not worth your time.

December 16th

The Stoics go on and on about your reasoned choice and how that’s the one thing under your control, but I’m not sure what this says about someone who has dementia.

December 17th

Know yourself. Explore yourself. Understand your mind before it’s too late.

December 19th

You don’t live long. You’re small. Try and keep perspective the next time something bad happens.

December 30th

You can take the bit out of any tough situation by bringing a calm mind to it. By considering it and meditating on it in advance.

Our only asset in time of trial is our calm and reasoned mind.

On November and Amor fati

I called bullshit a lot during November. That’s the one where you train yourself to love the bad things that happen to you. It’s almost delusional.